Pseudo-Live Blog: The Variable

Yay! New episode! Yay! Previously on!

• Looks like it's about Desmond and his mum. Based on the Previously On.
• Oh, I thought that was Miss Clu - the doctor lady.
• Aha... so Eloise pays Penny a visit then?
  
• Well, duh, we knew her son was Daniel. Uh, was there supposed to be mystery in that?
• So, Daniel is at the dock, seeing Miles.
  
• Dan wants to see the newbies. Fast. Now.
• And here's the clip that's been making the talk show rounds while Matthew Fox has been representin'.
• Whuuu...?? Oh. Star Trek. Meh.

• Must be young Dan. They got a good look-alike for his mum too. Where the heck are they? Why doesn't Daniel have a dialect?
• Destiny. There's that word again.
• Jack had too many clothes on.
• Juliet says. Sawyer does.
  
• Phil is in trouble. I don't really know why they told Jack about that.
  
• Oh! That's the weird scene we saw earlier in the season! The 'you need a hard hat down here' scene!!!
• Here is why the button is born. HOW the button is born?

• Hm. Maybe Daniel was doing reverse psychology on Dr. Chang?
• I really hate Daniel's 90's hair. And how about that control Eloise has over Daniel. Ha.
• He got a grant from Widmore - ah - yep, called it.
  
• Still wondering why the hell he doesn't have a dialect.
• No wonder everyone thinks Daniel is crazy. He IS.
• Oh, maybe he's not that crazy. Ha. He knows one of the hostiles is his mum.

• Oh! Yay, this is what we saw about Daniel when we first learned about him. Wonderful. Still don't know who that woman is.
• So, Widmore finds him.
• Wait, how does he get this memory thing.... what the fuckery? Need to know how the hell this happens.
  
• Weird, Widmore is telling Dan about the fake plane. WTF. I would be freaked if I was Dan.
• "Whoa. Why would you tell me that?" says Dan.
• And why wouldn't Dan remember tomorrow?
• See. Juliet overrode what Sawyer said/did.
  
• Dan's going to go see Charlotte. Hahaha. Weird.
  
• Wow, he looks super creepy. I would not want that man around my kid.
• Shootout at the old corral!
• Holy crap Dan is bleeding!

• What is with this memory thing? I want to know what the hell happened.
  
• WTF, how was Daniel all bleeding and stuff but now he's fine?
• Uh. Oh. Problems in Sawyeret-ville.
• BIG problems in Sawyeret-ville.
• Meanwhile, back in the jungle...
• The story of the button!!!
• WTF?!?!?! How NUTS would that be if flight 815 actually landed in LA like it was supposed to?!?!
• HYDROGEN BOMB!
• And then, back in present-day...
• Uh, I have a feeling little Charlie is not going to just be watched, but taken...
• Awww... Desny are so cute!
• Wait. Did Widmore just say that Daniel was his son too?!?!?!?!?! I mean, I always suspected... but.... ?!?!?!?!
• WHAT. The FUCK. She shot her own son. She shot - she killed Daniel!
• Wow. I am so very. very. sad! Ok, maybe just a little.
  

THIS is getting really interesting now.

Live Blog: "Some Like It Hoth"

Wow, no previously on... crazy! Who the - oh this is Miles. Get it.

Damn, I'm buzzed...ok. Gotta get it together....

• So little Miles is honing his skills. Yup. Dead body in a nearby apartment. Love those.
• Yeah, I would be scared if he were my kid too.
• And, 'present day'... they're trying to sneak lil Ben out. Miles is way older now. But the funny thing is that the little preview was probably just about 5 years before the Dharma stuff.
• Circle of Trust. hehehe... Horace the She-Man. (Sorry, actor. Sorry.)
• Oh, 334... what is that.
• WTF, who is that? Dead? Haha, fell into a ditch after he got SHOT IN THE HEAD!!!!!
• The dead guy is going to tell Miles all sorts of secrets. Love it.

Aaaannndddd... break!

• And we're back. Miles a little while ago. Meaning a little while from real present day.
• Poor mom is sick.... :-( And I kinda hate how they tried to make him look younger with that lame hairdo and piercings. He looks kinda stupid.
• Yeah, she's not going to tell him why/how he does what he does. But duh if Dad is dead, then Miles can talk to him instead. He's probably not even really dead. Just dead to her.
• "Somewhere you can NEVER go." That certainly wouldn't stop me. Just make me more determined - you?
• Haha... Hurley trying to prevent global warming. Nice.
• And Roger thinks Ben is dead... but how will they explain? Oh, play stupid. That makes sense. Don't get the drunk Work Man mad...
• I love Juliet. And I love Sawyeret. I hope they last.

• Shit, potty break made me miss the beginning. But duh, anyone knows that dead bodies release gas and smell in general. But Hurley doesn't know there's a body...
• Well, now he does.
• "You can talk to dead people..." Hehehe....
• Dude, Hurley, you... oh, wait. Christian? Is that what he means? Ana Lucia! Libby! Dave!!! Yes, he can.
• Now Miles looks his age. Thank God they are not trying to make him look younger.
• Sure, charge extra for a cremated body. Well, I guess I would too.
• Russell... Eh, I think he's BS'ing.
• NAOMI!!! I hate her wig - I mean, hair.
• Roger "Work Man" Linus is gross. Just putting that out there. What the fuck did he care about lil Ben anyway? He treated him like crap, so fuck Roger!!!
• Kate can never mind her own business, don't you know that Roger?
• "Love Will Keep Us Together" - nice.
• Ridiculous experiments on Hydra island, eh?
• WHAT?!?!?!?! That guy is his DAD?!?! Oh yeah... that's why his mom looked familiar. Shit. I should've picked up on that!!!!!!!

• Ugh. For whatever reason, I can't stand Naomi.
• WHOA! A purchase order for graves and an old airplane!!! Shit, that's the COVER UP!!!!!
• Still hate her wig.
• HOLY SHIT! $1.6 Million!!! Fuck yeah, I would go too!
• I still heart Matthew Fox...
• How did I NOT guess that Dr. Chang/Marvin Candle was Miles' dad. Fuck!
• Wait, fucking Miles is NOT my age. NOT AT ALL. He's like 40, and I am definitely NOT.
• I like that gate camo'd by the bushes. Nice touch. Wait, is this the Swan? It is, right. The HATCH!
• Oh shit, the numbers!!!!!

• Damn, they're just going to take him like that. I guess he's not getting that money after all.
• Oh, they don't want him to work for Widmore... so they must know Ben.
• Hm. What lies in the shadow of the statue? That has been brought up a few times.
• Yup, say it like it is, Miles. Get the money!!! Woooooo!
• But don't these guys know that no matter what, he'll end up with his dad anyway?
• The one that's gonna win... I wonder if we'll see these fools again.
• Dude, I do not like the FX!!! You can tell they're in some fake van with fake background. Eesh. I hate the little blue outline.
• "I don't wanna know him better... and stuff." hehehe.
• Dude, Hurley has a point. Miles needs to get this shit out.
• Hoth... here we go. He's writing something. What's a Hoth anyway? He's writing FanFic???? Lame. Hahah....
• OH - he's writing Empire Strikes Back... hahaha... he's going to pull a Biff. Hahahaha....
• La Fleur... I like. I like Sawyeret. I've said that already.
• "Get some rope." I like the sound of that... ;-)

Sheeeyoooooot.... internet got all f'd and I didn't save my last comments. But hey, this episode pretty much rocked my socks. Lost of reveals, and HELLO Dan Faraday!!!

Liveblog: Dead is Dead

Back in Ohio this week. Here we go!

• Previously on Lost: All sorts ofBen Linus stuff.
• Now, somedude riding a horse. And talk of Jacob! "The island chooses who the island chooses." - Richard Alpert.
• This guy looks all medieval and stuff. He's there to see Ben. Is this Widmore?
• Ben wantsto staywith the Others. Big surprise. Here is where Ben starts to become an Other.
• YES!!!! It IS Widmore!!!
• Wasthat a big flashback for old Ben?
• Land of the living my ass. These people are all dead. They have to be.
• I never believe this guy. Going to be judged.
• OH. By the Monster. Hmph.

I need to turn the cc off. And do the plank.

• Assassin lady. I didn't like her on New Amsterdam, and I don't like her now.
• What the heck was that exchange all about?
• And we still don't know who this guy is. He packed a gun. Ben is playing him.
• Alex is back in this episode.
• WTF Ben, you're an ass. He's making alliances.
• Ah, remember the good ol' days when he was Henry Gale? Benry, as we called him?
• Nice hair. Whoa, that's Ethan. Crazy. This is the late 80's-early 90s? Oh, 80's.
• He took Alex. That sucks. Poor Danielle.
• Ben didn't have the heart to kill Danielle. He was just getting started back then.
• So he really did love Alex, did he.
• The Elephant in the Room = the fact that you fucking KILLED ME.
• See, I knew it. Ben needed that information. The lady.
• B'whaaaa???? Decided to help Ben?!
• John Locke is a changed man since his death.
• Oh, Cesar. And that whole "My Friend" thing among certain men.
• Wow. Ben totally just shot Cesar. "Consider that my apology."

• Row, row, row... ok - couldn't help it.
• Oh yeah, who the hell beat Ben up? I can't remember.
• Aha. He wants to be judged for letting Alex die. Love it.
• Widmore, still ontheisland, eh?
• Complication my ass - he just couldn't kill her. Ben used to have a heart.
• And Ben questions Charles for the first time. Is it what Jacob wants? Is it?
• Goooooood question John! Whose idea was it?
• Whoa.... there's a freakin' person in Alex's room!!!! Alex? Be that you?
• Ha! Sun!
• Whoaaaaa... Christian came to tell them to wait for John! Freakin' nuts!!!!

• It's interesting that Lapidis is there at all.
• Aw... Sun + Jin Forever!
• I love Terry and Michael. Love them.
• So Ben CAN summon the monster. We guessed he might have last season when it came after Kiwi and his men. (Yes, I know it's Keamy, but I like to call him Kiwi.)
• Ew. WTF. Was that like a big toilet flush???
• God, Ben's hair is AWFUL.
• So this is how Charles leaves.
• Whoa. Charles was kinda right, eh? If the island wants her dead, she'll be dead. And so she died.
• So is Ben being judged because he KEPT Alex?
• Ben is scared... because he thinks they may be dead too, is my guess. Because that is what I fucking think.
• Hahahah! He told Sun to go back in fearing the monster, and it was just Locke. Oy.
• What da huh? John says he knows where Smoky is? Psh.

• Liar. John is not the same. Not JUST the same, at least.
• What. Ben kills Penny, eh? Nah. Don't believe it. But we will see how Ben got all beat up.
• Where the hell is that? The wall around our temple? Wha?
• UNDER the temple... isn't that where those dudes got sucked in by the monster? The ones that were with Danielle?
• WHAT? So he DID kill Penny? WTF. Fucking A.
• Is that supposed to be Long Beach? Yup. A sign for Catalina. Interesting.
• He can't kill a kid. Or can he?
• AHA! So Des beat the crap out of Ben. Love it. Love it!!!!

• What the fuckery is this? Ilana isin charge now? Geeze. I hate newbies.
• And this temple thing. This is just weird.
• Dude, that's totally where Ben needs to be.How does John NOT knowthat?
• What's with the hieroglyphics?
• WHOA! The monster existed back then!
• And now it's SURROUNDING Ben!!!!
• These FX are not that great.
• Ugh, that is so sad when Alex got shot. Hate these FX.
• That's not Alex. That's Smoky. Just like Eko saw his bro.
• So, Ben was going to kill Locke again. Adn I think he's lying when he ays he'll follow him.
• That's one long piece of vine John found.

This episode should have been amazing.... but it was - ugh. Maybe I need to think about it further. Maybe I'm just distracted from being here. In Ohio. Bored. Ugh.

Okie dokie. That's all I gotta say for now. Just not enlightened.

Psuedo-Live Blog: "What Happened, Happened"

Ah yes. Another Wednesday staying up late so that I can write this for you. And by you, I mean, me.

• Previously on Lost. Ok, we have Skate stuff going on. Mostly Kate, I guess. Something about her and Clementine and Aaron. (It kinda "helps" that I read the freakin' description of the episode, though.) Oh yeah, and Ben got shot last week by Sayid.
• So, Sayid did NOT break Jin's nec. I repeat, he did NOT break Jin's neck. Sorta disappointing in terms of dramatic effect, but glad to know Jinny-Jin-Jin is alive.
• Ben, meanwhile, is barely hanging on - or is he? He's a clever one, I'm sure even when he's severely injured.
• Meanwhile, back at Camp Dharma, people are trying to calmly get organized. And Jack starts asking questions. And She-man Horace doesn't like it. I say She-man because he looks like a menopausal woman who stopped caring about her looks.
  
• So Ben's papa is kinda flirty with Freckle. Ha. Ick. Ew. Oh, and he had her at Linus. Meaning, she felt the ick factor too.
• Jin carries a wounded Ben onto Camp Dharma. And Roger "Work Man" Linus actually seems to give a crap.
• Meanwhile, back in Hawaii - I mean, LA... aaron's a wittle baby. "Mama" Kate pays Cassidy a visit. "Baby Mama" Cassidy. And has to break the news that she knows Sawyer. Catfight, anyone???

• Tons of money!!! TONS!
  
• Sawyer sure told Kate a bunch of stuff in a short amount of time.
  
• Cassidy ain't buying this shiiiizzzz.
  
• So... no catfight?
  
• Cassidy is good. She know what's what with Aaron.
  
• Aaaaand... back on the island... Kate gets involved in business she ain't supposed to be involved in. Can't that bitch just keep still for a minute?
• god, horace got FAT. It's so easy to pick on him. It's probably very insulting to the actor who plays him.
• Hm. So Jack is a suspect, since they were janitor keys on the door. Of course, we know that Ben took 'em from The Work Man Supremo.
  
• Ooooh, see. Rog don't have the keys. Now he's Suspect Supremo.
• And they have the look on their face that says, "Jack has to fix this. Damnit, why does it always have to be Jack?"
• Hahahaha... Hurley: "Checking to see if I'm disappearing."
• Shit yeah, Miles' explanation is really confusing. How did something happen that you are unaware of? What is the point of origination?
• Aaaand... Jack refuses to help because he freakin' thinks he's God. As always. Could this be the season I finally like Sawyer more than Jack? I mean, Matthew Fox is looking a little more haggard....

• Jack is so right, he's done his part - he's saved Ben. Ah, finally he thinks he's NOT supposed to fix things. Ok, maybe I was a little premature about the Saywer/Jack thing.
  
• Oh, shoot. He's right, Kate didn't like the old Jack, either. So, basically, he just told her that she always liked Sawyer better.
• Hahaa, I was just going to say "Where's Ethan?" But uh, Ethan is a baby.
  
• Roger's not that stupid. He knows what Sawyer was up to asking him that key question. No pun intended.
• I like how Miles and Hurley are trying to figure out the whole time travel thing, in order to help us figure out what the hell is going on. Good device.
  
• Hurley's question about Ben remembering Sayid is exactly what I've been thinking. So... there really is no explanation, and it's the writers' way of saying, "Just don't think too much about it, peeps."
• Wow, Juliet. That's BOLD. Thinking of having The Others help. Why didn't I think of that? Oh yeah, because it's nearly midnight, and I'm TIRED.

• How is Kate going to manage? Juliet doesn't know Kate at all, does she.
• I like that we get to see everyone's perspective of what happened leading up to the Ajeera flight.
  
• Holy shit, how did she manage to lose Aaron?
  
• Whoa that was weird - she looked just like Claire. From the back. Totally uglier from the front.
• I wonder just how many of those Dharma vans there are.
• Of course Sawyer is going to help Freckles. But I LIKE Sawyerette!!!

• Who the hell has a No Smoking sign above their doorbell? Clearly that must've been a public house.
• So Kate and Cassidy have had an ongoing friendship. "Auntie Kate" says Clementine.
• Dude, Claire wasn't just gone - she didn't just leave him. She kinda... died?
• Eh, I dunno if I buy Kate taking a baby to fill the void of Sawyer.
  
• Awwww... Sawyer LURVS Juliette enough to help Ben! Awww....
  
• What? Juliet just barges in on Jack in the shower?
  
• What's up with Jack not drying off before putting his shirt on? And I love how he has a shirt on, but the towel could fall off at any moment... I mean, that's not very modest, is it.
• And Sawyer and Kate have a moment regarding Clementine. Well, it looks like Cassidy was right about Sawyer jumping from the 'copter.

• Apparently Christian Shepard likes 'em young and MILFy.
• Claire's mom sure doesn't look like Claire's MOM.
  
• Dude, Kate is crazy to tell Claire's mom about this Aaron stuff. AND the island stuff. Crazy!
• Here we go. I'm getting a little teary-eyed over Kate's goodbye.
  
• Why does Alpert look confused?
  
• Oh, that pretty much explains what happened to Ben. "He'll forget this ever happened, and his innocence will be gone. He will always be one of us." - Alpert.
• The Creation of Benjamin Linus - Manipulative Fuck.
• Where DID they go? And, backtracking a bit, WHO was it that Alpert was told to check with?
• And WHAT? Is that where young Ben woke up? In 'present day' with John Locke?

I have to say, I find that Kate-centric episodes have become increasingly less enjoyable. The fact that it was capped with something completely weird made it even more awkward for me. But it is past midnight now, and I'm all sleepsville, so...? Best thing about the episode was that Sawyer seems pret-ty darn dedicated to Juliet. Liking that.